Rocky Road!

Posted by Comman_Anomaly | Posted in | Posted on Thursday, April 15, 2010

Today is Thursday. Tuesday last week I was suicidal & anhedonic. Elated & blowing on flower pedals on Thursday. I crashed back down on Sunday, I wanted someone to kill me. Finally this Thursday I told my shrink about It All. Oh & that I had let my Cymbalta run out a week ago. Didn't help the rollercoaster, made it a little worse but I would have been all over the place anyway as I have been for a long while.
It is no excuse, but I could not wait until the fucking 23rd for any hope of new relief, maybe going off the Cymbalta would help, I didn't care that it could be bumpy. I wanted it gone.
My doctor refused to give me a PRN unless he saw me first, fine I'll just take care of it all myself.
I'm still on 150 of Lamictal, I need to be on a higher dose but I should just "be patient."
BE PATIENT!?

So anyway my therapist told my parents, so it's all out there.
I'm taking Celexa now, oh god the difference. So much better than the other crap.
T least for now I am stable, been in the exact same mood all day today, THAT is unbelievable. I had forgotton what a stable\normal mood was.

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