Stuck

Posted by Comman_Anomaly | Posted in | Posted on Saturday, December 05, 2009

Gah! My phone & internet is out at home, so I'm writing this from a library computer.
I have been shifting back & forth from all gung-ho surrender to my higher power & recovery to on the brink of full-on relapse. And I have no outlets, my sponser is out of town & I have no internet support either. I just don't know, last night I felt like "Why not relapse?"
And this morning after eating very little I was reading Wasted sort of in a attempt to trigger myself & it did the opposite nonetheless. I'm scared now, there will be a small amount of new groceries today & I don't know what to do with them.
I hope I can make my ABA meeting tomorrow.

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